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Learn to say no without guilt from "summary" of Calm the F*ck Down by Sarah Knight
Some people think it's selfish to say no. That it's rude, mean, unkind, impolite, or disrespectful. That it's somehow wrong or bad to turn down a request for your time, energy, attention, or money. That you owe it to someone to do as they ask, regardless of how you feel about it. That you should always put others' needs before your own, no matter the cost to your own well-being. That you should always be helpful, accommodating, agreeable, and available, no matter what else is going on in your life. But the truth is, saying no when you want to say no is not selfish. It's self-care. It's a way to protect your own boundaries, maintain your own priorities, and preserve your own well-being. It's a way to avoid overextending yourself, taking on too much, stretching yourself too thin, or burning yourself out. It's a way to honor your own needs, desires, limits, and values. It's a way to stay true to yourself, to be authentic, to live with integrity, and to be honest with others about what you can and cannot do. So when you say no, you're not being a bad person. You're not letting anyone down. You're not being mean or rude. You're not being selfish or inconsiderate. You're simply being honest. You're simply being realistic. You're simply being responsible. You're simply being true to yourself. You're simply valuing your own time, energy, attention, and money. You're simply setting boundaries, asserting your needs, and standing up for yourself. You're simply taking care of yourself and looking out for your own best interests. And you don't have to feel guilty about it. You don't have to apologize for it. You don't have to explain or justify or defend it. You don't owe anyone an explanation, an excuse, or a reason. You don't owe anyone your time, energy, attention, or money. You don't owe anyone anything, really. You don't owe it to anyone to say yes when you want to say no. You don't owe it to anyone to sacrifice yourself for their sake. You don't owe it to anyone to put their needs above your own. You don't owe it to anyone to be a people-pleaser, a pushover, a doormat, a martyr, or a victim.
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