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Address issues that are causing tension openly from "summary" of The Dance of Connection by Harriet Lerner

When tension arises in a relationship, it can be tempting to avoid addressing the underlying issues. We may fear conflict, rejection, or making things worse. However, keeping quiet about what is bothering us only allows the tension to fester and grow. It is important to confront the issues causing tension openly and honestly. By addressing issues openly, we create an opportunity for understanding and growth in the relationship. When we communicate openly about our feelings and concerns, we give the other person a chance to respond and share their perspective. This can lead to a deeper understanding of each other's needs and feelings, and ultimately strengthen the bond between us. Avoiding confrontation may seem easier in the short term, but it can have long-lasting negative consequences. Unresolved tension can lead to resentment, distance, and a breakdown in communication. By addressing issues openly, we prevent these negative outcomes and pave the way for healthier and more fulfilling relationships. It is natural to feel apprehensive about addressing difficult issues, but avoiding them only prolongs the discomfort. By mustering the courage to have open and honest conversations, we demonstrate our commitment to the relationship and our willingness to work through challenges together. This vulnerability can foster trust and intimacy, ultimately bringing us closer to the other person.
  1. Addressing issues that are causing tension openly is essential for maintaining healthy and strong relationships. By confronting the issues head-on, we create opportunities for growth, understanding, and connection. It may be uncomfortable in the moment, but the long-term benefits far outweigh the temporary discomfort. So, next time tension arises, take a deep breath and have the courage to address the issues openly. Your relationship will thank you for it.
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The Dance of Connection

Harriet Lerner

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