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Let go of the need for control from "summary" of Start Where You Are by Pema Chodron

The concept of releasing the grip of control is an essential aspect of working with our minds and emotions. By letting go of the need for control, we create space for acceptance and openness in our hearts. This does not mean that we should abandon all responsibility or effort, but rather that we should loosen our tight hold on how things should be and allow life to unfold as it is. When we cling to the need for control, we are often driven by fear and insecurity. We want things to go a certain way because we believe that this will bring us security and happiness. However, this attachment to control actually creates more suffering and stress in our lives. We become rigid and closed off, unable to adapt to the ever-changing nature of reality. By releasing the need for control, we can begin to cultivate a sense of trust in ourselves and in the unfolding of life. We can learn to let go of our fixed ideas and expectations, and instead embrace the uncertainty and impermanence of our experience. This allows us to be more present and responsive to whatever arises, rather than trying to force things to conform to our desires. Letting go of control also means letting go of our attachment to outcomes. We can take action and make choices without being attached to a particular result. This frees us from the burden of constantly trying to manipulate and manage every aspect of our lives. We can relax into the flow of life, trusting that we have the wisdom and resilience to handle whatever comes our way.
  1. Releasing the need for control is an act of surrender and humility. It requires us to acknowledge our limitations and to recognize that we are not in complete control of our lives. This can be a challenging and uncomfortable process, but it is also deeply liberating. When we let go of control, we open ourselves up to a world of possibilities and opportunities that we may have never imagined.
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Start Where You Are

Pema Chodron

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