Romantic love often involves an idealized perception of the partner from "summary" of On Romantic Love by Berit Brogaard
In the early stages of a romantic relationship, we tend to view our partner through rose-colored glasses. We focus on their positive qualities while overlooking any flaws or imperfections they may have. This idealized perception of our partner is a common feature of romantic love. We may project our own desires and fantasies onto our partner, creating an image of them that aligns with our own hopes and dreams. This idealized version of our partner can lead us to see them as perfect or flawless, even when they are not. This idealization can also serve as a defense mechanism, protecting us from the reality of our partner's shortcomings or the challenges of a real relationship. By seeing our partner in an idealized light, we can avoid facing the more complicated and messy aspects of love and intimacy. However, this idealized perception can also set unrealistic expectations for our partner and the relationship as a whole. When our partner inevitably fails to live up to this idealized image, we may feel disappointed or disillusioned. This can lead to conflict and tension in the relationship as we struggle to reconcile our idealized view with the reality of who our partner truly is. Despite the potential pitfalls of idealization, it is a natural and common aspect of romantic love. It allows us to experience the intense feelings of passion and infatuation that often characterize the early stages of a relationship. It is only as the relationship progresses and we come to know our partner more deeply that we are able to see them in a more realistic and balanced light.
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