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Use "I" statements to express concerns from "summary" of Getting to Yes by Roger Fisher,William Ury
When you have concerns that you need to express to the other party during a negotiation, it is important to do so in a way that is constructive and non-confrontational. One effective way to achieve this is by using "I" statements. By framing your concerns in terms of your own feelings and perspectives, rather than making accusations or pointing fingers, you can help to reduce defensiveness and create a more open and productive dialogue. For example, instead of saying "You never listen to my ideas," you could say "I feel frustrated when I don't feel heard in our discussions." This shifts the focus away from the other party's actions and towards your own experience, making it easier for them to understand where you are coming from and work towards a solution together. Using "I" statements can also help to keep the conversation focused on the issue at hand, rather than devolving into personal attacks or blame. When you speak from your own perspective, you are less likely to make assumptions about the other party's intentions or motivations, which can lead to misunderstandings and conflict. Furthermore, by expressing your concerns using "I" statements, you are taking ownership of your feelings and experiences, which can help to build trust and rapport with the other party. This can create a more positive and collaborative atmosphere for problem-solving and reaching agreements.- When expressing concerns during a negotiation, using "I" statements can be a powerful tool for promoting understanding, reducing defensiveness, and fostering collaboration. By framing your concerns in terms of your own feelings and perspectives, you can create a more open and productive dialogue that leads to mutually beneficial outcomes.
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