Communicate assertively from "summary" of Unfuck Your Brain by Faith G. Harper, PhD, LPC-S, ACS, ACN
When you communicate assertively, you express yourself clearly and directly while respecting the boundaries of others. It involves speaking up for yourself, setting boundaries, and advocating for your needs without being aggressive or passive. Assertive communication allows you to assert your rights, express your opinions, and stand up for yourself in a calm and confident manner. To communicate assertively, you need to be aware of your own thoughts, feelings, and needs, as well as those of others. This self-awareness helps you communicate effectively and assertively without resorting to manipulation or aggression. It also enables you to express yourself honestly and authentically, which fosters healthy relationships based on mutual respect and understanding. When communicating assertively, it is essential to use "I" statements to express your feelings and needs without blaming or accusing others. This technique helps you take ownership of your emotions and communicate them in a non-confrontational way. For example, instead of saying, "You never listen to me," you could say, "I feel unheard when you interrupt me." Another key aspect of assertive communication is setting boundaries and saying no when necessary. This involves being clear about your limits and communicating them assertively to others. By setting boundaries, you protect yourself from being taken advantage of or mistreated, and you show others how you expect to be treated. Assertive communication also involves active listening, which means paying attention to what others are saying without interrupting or judging them. By listening attentively and empathetically, you demonstrate respect for others' perspectives and validate their feelings. This open and respectful communication style fosters understanding and cooperation in your relationships. In summary, communicating assertively involves expressing yourself honestly and respectfully, setting boundaries, and advocating for your needs without being aggressive or passive. By practicing assertive communication, you can build healthy relationships based on mutual respect, understanding, and cooperation.
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