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Let Your Partner Influence You from "summary" of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman

One of the key principles for a successful marriage is the willingness to let your partner influence you. This means being open to your partner's opinions, thoughts, and feelings, and taking them into consideration when making decisions. It involves recognizing that your partner's perspective is just as valid as your own, and being willing to compromise and collaborate in order to find solutions that work for both of you. When you let your partner influence you, you show respect for their autonomy and agency in the relationship. You demonstrate that you value their input and are willing to make adjustments in your own behavior or attitudes based on their feedback. This can help foster a sense of equality and mutual respect in the marriage, leading to greater trust and intimacy between partners. Letting your partner influence you also requires good communication skills. It's important to listen actively to your partner, showing empathy and understanding for their point of view. This means putting aside your own defensiveness or ego, and truly trying to see things from your partner's perspective. By creating a safe space for open and honest communication, you can build a stronger emotional connection with your partner and work together more effectively as a team. In practice, letting your partner influence you might mean making compromises in areas where you have differing opinions or preferences. It could involve giving up some control or power in certain situations, in order to demonstrate your commitment to working together as equal partners. It might also require being willing to admit when you're wrong, and to apologize or make amends when you've hurt your partner in some way.
  1. Letting your partner influence you is about recognizing the importance of collaboration, compromise, and empathy in a healthy marriage. It's about valuing your partner's perspective and showing respect for their feelings and needs. By practicing this principle, you can create a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship with your spouse, based on mutual understanding and support.
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The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

John Gottman

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