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Foster a culture of appreciation from "summary" of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman, Ph.D.
Creating a culture of appreciation in a relationship involves more than simply saying "thank you" or giving compliments. It requires a genuine attitude of respect and admiration towards your partner. This means recognizing and valuing their positive qualities, efforts, and contributions to the relationship. When you foster a culture of appreciation, you are cultivating an environment where both partners feel seen, heard, and understood. This builds a sense of connection and emotional intimacy, which are essential for a strong and healthy relationship. It also helps to counteract the negative effects of criticism and contempt, which can erode the foundation of a marriage. One way to show appreciation is by expressing gratitude for the little things that your partner does. This could be as simple as thanking them for doing the dishes or making you a cup of coffee. These small gestures of appreciation can go a long way in strengthening the bond between you and your partner. Another important aspect of creating a culture of appreciation is to focus on your partner's positive qualities and strengths. Instead of dwelling on their flaws or shortcomings, make an effort to notice and acknowledge the things that you admire and appreciate about them. This can help to create a positive and uplifting atmosphere in your relationship. It's also important to communicate your appreciation to your partner in a way that resonates with them. Everyone has their own love language, so it's essential to understand how your partner prefers to receive appreciation. Some people may appreciate words of affirmation, while others may prefer acts of service or physical touch. By taking the time to truly appreciate and value your partner, you are not only strengthening your bond but also creating a foundation of mutual respect and admiration. This can help to weather the storms that inevitably come in any relationship and foster a deeper sense of connection and love.
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