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Building love maps deepens intimacy and understanding from "summary" of The Relationship Cure by John Gottman, PhD,Joan DeClaire

Building love maps involves regularly updating the information we have about our partner’s world. This process requires us to make a conscious effort to stay connected to our partner’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences. By doing so, we deepen our understanding of who they are and what they value. This understanding is the foundation of intimacy in a relationship. When we have a detailed love map of our partner, we are better equipped to respond to their needs and desires. We can anticipate their reactions in different situations and provide them with the support they need. This level of insight fosters a sense of emotional closeness and connection between partners. Building love maps also involves active listening and empathy. When we truly listen to our partner’s thoughts and feelings, we demonstrate that we care about what is important to them. This validation strengthens our bond and creates a safe space for open communication and vulnerability. The process of building love maps is ongoing and requires effort from both partners. It involves asking questions, sharing experiences, and being present in each other’s lives. By continuously updating our love maps, we show our commitment to understanding and supporting our partner through the ups and downs of life.
  1. Building love maps is a way to nurture and deepen the intimacy in a relationship. It allows us to connect on a deeper level with our partner and create a strong foundation of trust and understanding. This process is essential for building a lasting and fulfilling partnership based on mutual respect and appreciation.
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The Relationship Cure

John Gottman, PhD

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