Letting go of unrealistic expectations and perfectionism from "summary" of The Dance of Intimacy by Harriet Goldhor Lerner
In our relationships, expectations can be a double-edged sword. On one hand, they can serve as guideposts for how we want to be treated and how we want to treat others. On the other hand, they can easily become unrealistic standards that no one can live up to. When we hold onto these unrealistic expectations, we set ourselves up for disappointment and frustration. Perfectionism is another trap that many of us fall into. We believe that we must be perfect in order to be loved and accepted. We strive for flawlessness in every aspect of our lives, from our appearance to our achievements to our relationships. But the truth is, perfection is an impossible standard. It is a moving target that we can never quite reach. When we let go of unrealistic expectations and perfectionism, we free ourselves from the burden of trying to control everything and everyone around us. We allow ourselves to be imperfect,...
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