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Building attachment with our children is crucial from "summary" of Hold on to Your Kids by Gordon Neufeld,Gabor Maté
Attachment with our children is not just important, it is crucial. It is the foundation upon which all other aspects of our relationship with them are built. Without a strong attachment, our children will not feel secure or connected to us. They will not trust us or look to us for guidance. They will seek out attachment with peers instead, which can lead to all sorts of problems. Building attachment with our children requires time, effort, and intention. It means being present and available to them, both physically and emotionally. It means listening to them, validating their feelings, and responding to their needs. It means showing them love and affection, setting boundaries and limits, and providing them with a sense of security and stability. When we have a strong attachment with our children, they will be more likely to listen to us, respect us, and follow our guidance. They will feel safe and secure in our presence, knowing that we will always be there for them. They will be less likely to seek out attachment with peers, as they will already have a strong attachment with us. In order to build attachment with our children, we must be willing to put in the time and effort required. We must be patient and understanding, even when our children push us away or test our limits. We must be consistent in our approach, showing them that we are always there for them, no matter what. Attachment is not something that can be forced or rushed. It takes time to develop and grow, but the effort is well worth it in the end. When we have a strong attachment with our children, we will have a strong foundation upon which to build a healthy and loving relationship.
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