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External validation should not be the driving force behind our actions from "summary" of CrazyBusy by Edward M. Hallowell
When we rely on external validation to guide our actions, we are essentially giving others the power to dictate our choices and determine our self-worth. This is a dangerous game to play, as it can lead us down a path of perpetual seeking approval and never truly feeling satisfied with ourselves. We become like puppets, dancing to the tune of others' opinions, unable to break free from the cycle of seeking validation. The problem with seeking external validation is that it is a never-ending quest. No matter how much approval we receive from others, it will never be enough to fill the void within us. We will always be left wanting more, constantly looking for the next hit of validation to temporarily boost our self-esteem. This is a recipe for burnout and dissatisfaction, as we will never be able to truly find happiness and fulfillment from outside sources. Instead of relying on external validation, we must learn to cultivate self-compassion and self-acceptance. We must recognize our own inherent worth and value, independent of what others think of us. This requires a shift in mindset, from seeking approval from others to seeking approval from ourselves. We must learn to be our own cheerleaders, celebrating our accomplishments and acknowledging our worthiness. When we prioritize self-validation over external validation, we free ourselves from the shackles of others' opinions. We become empowered to make choices that align with our values and goals, rather than seeking validation from external sources. This leads to a greater sense of autonomy and self-confidence, as we learn to trust ourselves and our own judgment. In a world that is constantly bombarding us with messages about how we should look, act, and be, it can be difficult to tune out the noise and listen to our own inner voice. But by prioritizing self-validation over external validation, we can reclaim our sense of self and live authentically. We can break free from the cycle of seeking approval and instead focus on cultivating a deep sense of self-worth that comes from within.
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