Codependency can be passed down through generations from "summary" of Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwood
The idea that codependency can be transmitted from one generation to the next is a powerful one. When we grow up in an environment where unhealthy behaviors are normalized, we are more likely to repeat those patterns in our own relationships. We learn how to love from those around us, and if the love we receive is conditional, manipulative, or abusive, we may come to believe that this is just how relationships are supposed to be. As children, we are like sponges, absorbing everything we see and experience in our families. If our parents are codependent, we may learn to prioritize their needs above our own, to sacrifice our own well-being for the sake of keeping the peace or gaining their approval. We may learn that love is something we have to work for, or that we have to earn by being perfect, by always putting others first, by never expressing our own needs or desires. This cycle can be difficult to break because it is so deeply ingrained in us. We may not even realize that we are repeating the patterns we learned in childhood until we find ourselves in yet another toxic relationship, feeling once again unappreciated, used, and unfulfilled. We may see ourselves making the same excuses for our partners, accepting the same mistreatment, and wondering why we can never seem to find a healthy, loving relationship. But the good news is that once we become aware of these patterns, we have the power to change them. We can learn to recognize codependent behaviors in ourselves and in others, and we can choose to break the cycle of dysfunction that has been passed down through the generations. We can learn to set boundaries, to prioritize our own well-being, and to seek out relationships that are based on mutual respect, trust, and genuine care. It may not be easy, and it may require a lot of self-reflection, therapy, and hard work, but it is possible to break free from the chains of codependency and to create a healthier, happier future for ourselves and for the generations to come.
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