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Recognize and address gridlock from "summary" of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman, Ph.D.

Gridlock happens when a couple's perpetual issues are causing tension and conflict in the relationship. These issues are complex and deeply rooted in each partner's values, beliefs, and personality. When gridlock occurs, it can feel like there is no way to find a resolution, leading to frustration and resentment. However, it is crucial for couples to recognize when they are in a state of gridlock and take steps to address it. One way to address gridlock is to understand the underlying meanings and emotions behind each partner's stance on the issue. By listening to each other's perspective with empathy and openness, couples can gain a deeper understanding of why the issue is so important to their partner. This can help create a sense of connection and emotional intimacy, even in the midst of conflict. Another strategy to address gridlock is to find areas of compromise and common ground. While couples may not be able to find a solution that satisfies both partners completely, they can work together to find a middle ground that honors each other's values and needs. By focusing on areas of agreement and shared goals, couples can move past gridlock and strengthen their relationship. It is also essential for couples to be willing to be flexible and open to change. Sometimes, the solution to gridlock may require one or both partners to adjust their expectations or beliefs. By being willing to adapt and grow together, couples can break free from gridlock and create a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship.
  1. Recognizing and addressing gridlock in a relationship requires patience, understanding, and a willingness to work together. By acknowledging the complexity of the issues at hand and approaching them with empathy and openness, couples can overcome gridlock and build a stronger, more resilient partnership.
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The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

John Gottman, Ph.D.

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