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Love is a choice, not just a feeling in marriage from "summary" of The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy Keller,Kathy Keller

In marriage, it is common to believe that love is primarily a feeling that comes and goes. However, the truth is that love is not just a feeling, but also a choice that we make every day. It is a decision to commit to someone through thick and thin, in sickness and in health, for better or for worse. This choice to love is what sustains a marriage through the inevitable ups and downs of life. When we view love as only a feeling, we allow external circumstances to dictate the strength of our relationship. But when we understand that love is a choice, we take control of our own actions and reactions. We choose to love our spouse even when they are difficult to love, even when we don't feel like it. This is what it means to love unconditionally, to love as an act of the will rather than just a response to emotions. This concept of choosing to love is rooted in the biblical understanding of marriage. As Christians, we believe that marriage is a covenant relationship, a sacred bond that reflects the love and commitment that God has for us. Just as God's love for us is unwavering and unconditional, so too should our love be for our spouse. This means choosing to love them not just when it is easy or convenient, but especially when it is hard. By making the choice to love our spouse, we demonstrate true sacrificial love, the kind of love that puts the needs of the other before our own. This kind of love requires humility, forgiveness, and selflessness. It requires us to set aside our own desires and preferences in order to prioritize the well-being and happiness of our spouse. This is the kind of love that can transform a marriage from good to great, from mediocre to extraordinary. In the end, love is not just a feeling that comes and goes. It is a choice that we make every day, a decision to commit to our spouse with unwavering devotion. By choosing to love in this way, we not only strengthen our marriage, but we also reflect the love of God to the world around us. Love is a choice, a powerful choice that has the ability to transform our lives and our relationships for the better.
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    The Meaning of Marriage

    Timothy Keller

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