Parents should avoid taking sides in sibling disputes from "summary" of Siblings Without Rivalry by Adele Faber,Elaine Mazlish
When siblings argue, parents often feel the need to intervene and take sides. They may believe that by choosing one child over the other, they are maintaining fairness and justice in the household. However, this approach can actually exacerbate the conflict rather than resolve it. When parents take sides, they inadvertently create a power dynamic that can fuel further rivalry between siblings. The child who feels favored may become emboldened and continue to provoke the other sibling, leading to a cycle of escalation. On the other hand, the child who feels unfairly treated may harbor resentment towards both the sibling and the parent, causing tension within the family unit. By refraining from taking sides, parents can send a powerful message to their children that they value their relationship and are committed to fostering harmony in the home. Instead of assigning blame or choosing winners and losers, parents can act as mediators and help their children work through their conflicts in a constructive manner. When parents remain neutral, they encourage their children to develop conflict resolution skills and learn how to communicate effectively with each other. This approach empowers siblings to find mutually beneficial solutions and strengthen their bond in the process. It also teaches them important life skills that they can carry with them into adulthood.- By avoiding the temptation to take sides in sibling disputes, parents can create a more peaceful and harmonious environment for their children to grow and thrive. They can promote empathy, understanding, and cooperation among siblings, laying the foundation for a strong and enduring relationship that will benefit them throughout their lives.
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