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Practice selfawareness to understand your communication patterns from "summary" of Say What You Mean by Oren Jay Sofer

To understand your communication patterns, it's important to start by practicing self-awareness. This means paying attention to your thoughts, emotions, and bodily sensations as you engage in conversation. By becoming more aware of your internal experience, you can begin to notice how it influences the way you communicate with others. Take a moment to reflect on how you typically respond in different situations. Do you tend to get defensive when someone criticizes you? Do you avoid conflict at all costs? Are you quick to jump in and offer advice when someone shares a problem with you? These are just a few examples of common communication patterns that can impact the quality of your interactions. Once you've identified some of your habitual ways of communicating, it's helpful to explore the underlying beliefs and emotions that drive them. For instance, if you notice that you often interrupt others when they're speaking, you might uncover a belief that your opinions are more important than theirs. By bringing awareness to these underlying factors, you can begin to make more intentional choices about how you engage with others. Another important aspect of self-awareness is tuning into the impact of your communication on others. Notice how people react to your words and actions. Do they seem engaged and receptive, or do they appear defensive or withdrawn? By paying attention to these cues, you can gain valuable insights into how your communication style is perceived by others and make adjustments as needed.
  1. Practicing self-awareness is a foundational step in improving your communication skills. By becoming more attuned to your internal experience, identifying your communication patterns, exploring their underlying drivers, and tuning into their impact on others, you can cultivate greater clarity, compassion, and effectiveness in your interactions. So take the time to reflect on your communication habits and start building a deeper understanding of yourself and how you relate to others.
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Say What You Mean

Oren Jay Sofer

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