Use enforceable limits to set boundaries from "summary" of Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood by Jim Fay,Charles Fay
Enforceable limits are the key to setting boundaries with young children. These limits are boundaries that we can enforce consistently, without losing our cool or engaging in power struggles. When we establish enforceable limits, we are essentially setting the stage for our children to learn to make choices and take responsibility for their actions.
One example of an enforceable limit is giving choices within limits. For instance, instead of saying, "What do you want for breakfast?" which opens up a wide range of options and potential arguments, we can say, "Would you like cereal or toast for breakfast?" This way, we are providing our child with a sense of control while still setting clear boundaries.
Another example is using natural consequences to enforce limits. If a child refuses to wear a jacket on a cold day, the natural consequence would be that they feel cold. By allowing them to experience the consequence of their choice, we are teaching them that their actions have repercussions.
Consistency is crucial when it comes to enforcing limits. Children thrive on routine and predictability, so it's important for parents to stick to the boundaries they have set. When we are consistent in enforcing limits, children learn to trust that we mean what we say and that there are consequences for their actions.
It's also important to remember that setting enforceable limits doesn't mean being harsh or punitive. Love and Logic parenting is about providing children with opportunities to learn from their mistakes in a safe and supportive environment. By setting clear boundaries and enforcing them with love and empathy, we can help our children develop self-discipline and responsibility.
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