Provide specific feedback to encourage positive behavior from "summary" of How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber,Elaine Mazlish
When you notice a behavior you like, it's important to give your child specific feedback. Instead of saying, "Great job!" try to be more descriptive. For example, you could say, "I noticed how you helped your sister pick up her toys without being asked. That was really thoughtful of you." By providing specific feedback, you are showing your child exactly what they did right and why it was important. This kind of feedback helps reinforce positive behavior because it lets your child know exactly what they did that was good. It also shows that you are paying attention and appreciate their efforts. This can be very motivating for children, as it helps them understand the impact of their actions. When giving feedback, try to be genuine and sincere. Your child will be able to tell if you are just saying something to make them feel good. Be specific and honest in your praise, and your child will be more likely to continue the positive behavior in the future. It's also important to be consistent with your feedback. If you only notice and comment on negative behaviors, your child may start to feel like they can never do anything right. By acknowledging and praising positive behavior regularly, you are reinforcing good habits and building your child's self-esteem. Remember to focus on the behavior itself, rather than the child. Instead of saying, "You are such a good boy/girl," try saying, "I really appreciate it when you remember to say please and thank you." This way, you are reinforcing the specific behavior you want to see more of. By providing specific feedback to encourage positive behavior, you are helping your child learn and grow in a positive way. Your praise and encouragement will help them feel good about themselves and motivate them to continue making good choices. So, be attentive, specific, and consistent in your feedback, and watch as your child's positive behavior blossoms.
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